Day of Rest
Today will be a day of rest. I rose early, but it’s likely that I’ll take my first nap around noon today…right after a massive pancake breakfast, hopefully satisfying the bodies of the many beautiful beings sleeping in this house this morning. Yeah, that’s right. I said “first nap”. There may be two.
Some of the drama has subsided, which is strange to say, since we are still dealing with Covid in our midst…well, closer than in our midst. Our family has been personally touched by the fear, and I’m grateful that it came in the asymptomatic form, for sure. Thank God for that.
Are you ready for a positive writing this morning? Jesus, I haven’t exactly been transmitting elation in written form recently, but that must be okay with you. If this blog is meant to communicate anything at ALL, please know that sometimes…all is not right with our world. There will be challenges. We all know this. Some may say to take it “one day at a time”, and I DO always consider this strategy. But I find it most important to start the day with my “eye on the prize”. I start there, because this girl knows what she wants and is fearless in voicing my intention first. You gotta know where you are headed, and then sure, you can attempt to focus on the present.
That’s exactly what the last few days have been: a balance between eyeing the prize with patience and determination, and a conscious effort to stay in the moment…because whatever ACTUALLY threatens your happiness is usually intermittent, right? Those threats aren’t sitting across the table eating those pancakes. That’s just a child, so keep things in perspective. Put the thoughts of that threat aside for that hour and focus on that child. Pour a little syrup on that sadness. Yes, I actually say things like this out loud. You’re welcome.
My Covid-kid gets to come to the house today, after having stayed sequestered at another household after her positive test for the recommended amount of time dictated by the doctor and also the CDC site. I’m over the moon about that, because while I’ve seen her some, she hasn’t stayed in this household in almost three weeks. Without giving you exact details, let’s just say that this little Covid situation seemed to soil any unsubstantiated argument and also any questioning of my sobriety. The threat isn’t entirely over, but everything has taken a positive turn. I’ve proven anything I can prove physically, which should have taken the fuel out of the fire. But really, it was having one of the kiddos test positive, which seemed to turn the tables. The boys came here, since they tested negative…and MAGICALLY, my sobriety was no longer in question. I mean, it was already proven anyway. I wasn’t worried about that. And it wasn’t about sobriety. It was about intimidation.
Jesus, can we all stop focusing on threats that aren’t even real right now? Don’t we have enough to deal with? So even though we’ve had the Covid drama…the last few days have been pretty great. A lot. But great.
Thursday and Friday were spent driving my 16-year old to a baseball tournament over 2 hours away, driving to and from each day and sitting in the sun for around 8 hours while they played double-headers. Oh man, it was a joy to watch my son do what he loves to do, videoing each attempt at the plate, so that he can watch and analyze each effort on the way home. That’s always his request. He’s rather focused on improvement, so I videoed as he chose whether or not he was a lefty or a righty with each attempt. That’s always fun. Obviously, he’s a switch hitter, so it keeps things interesting.
As always, we had great conversations while on the multiple trips, the last of which was a 2-hour discussion of just about every controversial topic we could think of: Trump, abortion, gun control, legalizing marijuana, gay rights. Yep, we covered it all. I love that he feels comfortable and confident in sharing his views with me. We don’t align on everything, and that’s perfectly acceptable to me. What I know is that he’s a thinking and feeling human being, who expresses his opinions with rational thought and respect for the person he’s speaking to. Therefore, I know everything I really need to know about him. And it was very cool to check in with him on all of these topics. He was even leading the conversation. I didn’t drag him into some exchange that he wanted to avert. Even THAT was telling.
And there was also plenty of Kings of Leon and hip-hop music blaring, because the drives were arduous at best. You can probably figure out which choice was mine, but each drive is a compromise in taste. I don’t like to control each decision. Sometimes I share in his world, and sometimes he shares in mine.
Each night we made it home around ten, and I tried NOT to clean the house when I walked through the door. It’s not that everything falls apart when I’m away. That’s not what I’m implying. But let’s just say that a lot happens here within these walls, when Mama goes out of town for the day. Each day left Mike, trying to work from home during business hours, and six kiddos playing, eating and filling their days with all sorts of time-fillers.
Yep, that’s right. We’ve got seven of our eight children here, all communing together. And THIS is our happy place. Sometimes it’s a little bit of a Crazy Place, but we embrace it with positivity, tolerance, and our “eyes on the prize”, right? Absolute household cleanliness and order sometimes take a backseat to overall happiness and creative productivity. Those are our prizes, and we try to remember this most of the time.
Three summers ago, Mike and I married and had all of the children together for the first time…and we LEARN MORE and DO BETTER each and every summer, because this is the most EXTENDED time that they all have together. That first summer, we used to meet in the driveway in lawn chairs and have what we called Camp Counselor Meetings, where we discussed plans for the day, grocery lists, and any other current issues that seemed prudent to brainstorm about or negotiate. I guess you could say that we see ourselves not as dictators, but as facilitators in our family compound. And there is daily effort on both of our parts to balance self-care with parental sacrifice. We may be tired, but there’s nothing that has made us question our love for one another, and the great privilege that we have in being parents to this baseball team of unique players.
Today, we’ll have all eight together, and yes, that’s enough. While it would be glorious to see what kind of being might be created from Mike and I’s biology…we are too old for that shit. We consider these eight plenty, and grocery bills are enough of a deterrent, for sure. Summers are the only time I shop at Walmart. Usually, I don’t appreciate that store or their politics, but when you are feeding the particular preferences of eight children, you must prioritize differently. I mean, sometimes a $3 box of Honey Buns goes a LONG WAY.
I spent years purchasing all organic fruits and veggies and making my own granola bars from scratch, but things change, ya’ll. You make different choices in life, and your prioritization of goals and values changes right along with them. I still make those granola bars every now and then, but I just can’t put those same expectations upon myself. We choose to spend funds on elaborate dinners, where at least three of the children are involved, sometimes manning the 36-inch outdoor griddle, creating shrimp fried rice…Benihana Style, baby! It’s a hoot, and it’s ALL created outside on the deck. Ha! Yep. That’s what Mike got for Father’s Day, so we’ve used it for many of the meals. Remember what I said? We learn each summer? Yeah well…THAT idea was a long time coming and has absolutely CHANGED our LIVES!!! It was not lost on Mike that the gift would also benefit Mama and my obsessive cleaning nature. But also know that I knew that cooking would be a communal event. “Always thinking, I am.” Yoda spoke, and I listened.
Yesterday included a trip to the Llano river and back. Two vehicles, lots of sunscreen, sandwiches made by each Eater, floatation devices and DQ Blizzards for everyone on the way home. We took a vote for that last one. Before leaving the river, we offered Blizzards on the way home or pizza for dinner. The general consensus was Blizzards, so everyone ate leftovers from the fridge for dinner, prepared by themselves, and with the expectation that all dishes make it to the sink at least. Praise for those who actually put them in the dishwasher. Then I started laundry from the day, took a fantastic shower and lounged in bed for the evening. That’s about it, really. And THAT was plenty again.
I didn’t really philosophize so obviously in this writing. I suppose I hope that I don’t have to do that so much anymore. If you read often, you already know me pretty well.
I am so EVER grateful that things settled down enough for me to focus my writing on what fills up my heart and my time in fruitful ways in this present moment. The last few weeks have been a real challenge, but I know that my positive spirit and focus on the Prizes In Life have been present.
There are eight of them, ages ten through twenty, and they will cook, eat, play and sleep here tonight.
Life is good…but yes, I need a nap.
Maybe two.
